Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Note to Myself # 18





This is a big one for me
because one of my assets is loyalty
to people I love.

I will cheer them on
tell them when I think they're making a mistake
urge them to take a chance when the risk seems reasonable
and pick them up when they've fallen.

That's what friends (or family) do for each other,
at least in my world view.

So my admonition is
"Always stand by your friends."

At the same time,
I know that there's a Shadow side to loyalty.
It can make you blind to instances 
where loyalty isn't a two-way street
and a person's behavior is deserving
of no-nonsense boundaries. . . .
including expulsion from your realm
until they've repented of their unacceptable actions.

Lying to or about you, for instance.
Being unfaithful.
Being emotionally abusive.
Expecting you to always be there for them
even when they're never around when you need them

Excessive loyalty can sometimes make you blind
to truths that everyone else can see.

Sometimes to be loyal to yourself,
you have to cut the ties that bind
and walk away.

Tuesday, January 17, 2017

Note to Myself # 17




It feels like clown energy is running rampant.

Someone in a position of power is making
inflammatory and outrageous statements,
bullying and mocking people,
threatening revenge on members of the press
who don't post articles adulating him.

There are clowns in this world
that can dish out all kinds of insults,
but want to be kowtowed to themselves.

Who think the whole world
exists to enhance their exalted view of themselves, 
to fall in line with their every whim 
(no matter how obnoxious or self-indulgent).

Who think they're smarter than everyone else
and that they're so special
rules don't apply to them.

But we know the truth about them.
If these Emperors have a splendid set of clothes,
they put on their pants one leg at a time,
just like us commoners.

And if they were really so special,
they wouldn't need to remind us so often.

So
no matter what,
don't let these clowns get you down.

Flaunting the rules
and making end runs around the truth
has consequences eventually.

So run amok, Clowns. . . 
but remember,
Barnum & Bailey's is closing 
after more than 100 years.






Monday, January 16, 2017

In Honor of Martin Luther King Day





Love, compassion and kindness.
Act it out.
Pay it forward.

You've got this!

Note to Myself # 16




Sunday, January 15, 2017

Note to Myself # 15





Best friends
together through thick and Thin Mints,
through boyfriends and husbands
and often back to boyfriends
(if we're so inclined). . .
a sounding board
a person who'll tell you the truth
with love, when possible
and with no-holds-barred when not.
A person who loves you
when you're wearing no makeup
and your house is a mess,
and who's willing to go on vacation
with you when you just have to get outta town.

Who'll tell you secrets
and never, ever repeat yours.

To whom you say, "I'm on my way," 
when a crisis arises,
no matter what day or time or situation.

Who may sometimes make you mad,
but who would never ever vote for Trump
so you forgive her
(and she forgives you when ---
though it rarely happens ---
you annoy the hell out of her).

A sister 
in everything but birth.



Saturday, January 14, 2017

Note to Myself # 14







When you give a gift -- of material things or yourself --
the intention behind the act is important.

Sometimes we give out of a feeling of obligation.

Sometimes we give to get.
Or to have someone indebted to us.

Giving with a pure and loving heart,
with no expectations or attachment to
what happens afterwards. . . . 
well that's a rare gift.




Friday, January 13, 2017

Note to Myself # 13





When we're little girls
(or boys, as the case might be)
the people around us teach us
who we are
or at least
who others think we are
but their reactions to us.

If we're lucky,
their labels for us are both positive
and fitting
and we incorporate those characterizations
into our self-image.

If they send negative messages like
you're so stupid!
how could you be so clumsy?
you'll never amount to anything!
can't you do anything right?
well, we incorporate those lies too.

One of the most difficult tasks
we face as adults is sorting
through the labels in our label bank
and deciding which ones fit
and which ones need to be sent
to the trash heap.

Keeping not only the good ones,
but owning some of the bad ones
that we've discovered for ourselves.
Each of us is sometimes too impatient,
lazy, too quick to anger,
unforgiving.
If we don't own the negatives,
to be very conscious of our Shadow side
if you will,
then those Shadow traits often run amok.

On the other hand,
if we don't think that we are 
kind and compassionate
smart and capable
loving and worthy of love
then we've lost the very best of us.

As children, we were captive
to messages from those whose realms
we were assigned or exposed to,
whether those messages were positive or negative,
whether they were accurate
or projections of their own stuff.

As adults, we get to 
make our own choices.
Decide who we are at the most basic levels.

We get to choose 
what we believe
in our heart of hearts
when we say
this is who I am.